Tribute to Forum Members: Experiencing Anxiety

physicsmon24

Active member
First and foremost, I think all the members on this forum are amazing. You reach out to strangers and offer your sincerest advice on how to help them with their symptoms and anxiety and provide a place of comfort for a condition that, unless you have it, no one else understands. So, I applaud you all.The reason I want to share this experience with you is not to instill fear and panic but rather to show you how my situation, symptoms and progression are NOTHING like what 99.999% of the members on this forum are experiencing. Having said that, I'd like to walk you through my journey and I'll comment on what I and my docs overlooked at the time but why it all makes sense now. I was diagnosed with definite ALS yesterday at the WVU ALS approved Nuerologic Center by the Director of the ALS Clinic. After conducting my EMG, he called my wife in to the exam room and gave us the news. He said he knew it was ALS even before he did the EMG based on the atrophy and weakness in my left hand and my speech. Now, going back to the beginning.In April of 2014 I noticed a twitch in my left bicep. It was fairly constant and never let up. NOT a few twitches a few times per day but CONSTANT. Within two weeks the twitching had spread everywhere in my body. Again, NOT a few twitches here and there but FAR TOO MANY TO EVEN COUNT. Now, and this is very important, I WAS ALSO EXPERIENCING CRAMPS THROUGHOUT MY BODY. These were not your normal cramps that you get when you over-exert a muscle but ones I had never experienced before. For example, when I would bend down to tie my shoe, I would get cramps in my abdomen. The muscle would tighten up and I would have to quickly straighten up to get the muscle to release. If I would reach over my shoulder to scratch my back, my bicep would do the same thing and I would have to quickly straighten out my arm to get the muscle to relax. I thought this was all part of the twitching. The most noticeable symptom that concerned me from the beginning is what was happening in my left hand. Although I immediately noticed that the thenar muscle (web between the thumb and pointer finger) on my left hand was smaller than the right, I chalked that up to being right hand dominant. But, there was more than that. WHEN I WOULD GRIP SOMETHING TIGHT WITH MY LEFT HAND, MY FINGERS WOULD PULL IN TOWARDS MY PALM AND LOCK IN PLACE. Carpal tunnel symptoms?? That's what I thought but the NCS test I had in June and September did not show a conduction block in the ulnar nerve. Again this all started with twitching AND cramping in April.My first clinical neurological exam was at the end of May with a GENERAL NEUROLOGIST. I passed all strength tests and he did not notice any atrophy anywhere on my body. He scheduled my first EMG on June 12th. Even though I was having symptoms on my left side, he only did my right side. Other than fasciculations, the EMG was clean. I was diagnosed with Cramp Fasciculation Syndrome. Now, fast forward a couple of months to August. Next symptom, excess phlem (or so I thought). I was constantly clearing my throat. Especially after eating. This was attributed to summer allergies and/or the acid reflux I have had for 15 years. However, what I now know is that it was NOT EXCESS MUCUS. I had no allergy symptoms that would be typical like sneezing, itchy watery eyes, stuffy nose, etc. Now I know that my throat muscles had started to WEAKEN and what was normal mucus that everyone produces was becoming hard for me to swallow but NO ONE picked up on this and passed it off. In September I was referred to the Cleveland Clinic Neuromuscular Center by my PCP. by this time the atrophy was really showing in my left thenar. Cleveland did an extensive EMG on my left side. You can read my post from October to get the details there. What they concluded was that my abnormal EMG was due to a compression in my cervical spine although the MRI that was done did not support anything that serious. I was told to control my anxiety and do daily stetches to help with the cramps. They did not schedule me for a follow-up, they released me. In October, I began having issues with my speech. Ever so slight. I would stumble over certain words. Other days I would speak fine. In November, and I remember this so vividly, I was at the grocery store and picked up a bag of flour. It had a hole in the bottom and I got flour on my hand. I went to blow the flour off my hand and hardly any air came out my mouth. It came out of my nose. This was very concerning to me. I also noticed that I could no longer sing like I used to and I had been singing since I was 5 years old. I had lost my higher range and my voice seemed to cut out if I tried to sustain a note. Went to the ENT doc and he examined me thoroughly. Said my soft palate was moving fine and it was likely due to sticky mucus on my vocal cords. THESE WERE SUBTLE SIGNS OF WEAKNESS THAT WAS SPREADING AND GETTING PROGRESSIVELY WORSE.By December, 8 months after the first symptoms, I had truly began to slur my words. I sounded drunk, plain and simple. Everyone noticed it although I must say I noticed it way before others. We know our bodies and we know when something isn't right. In January I went back to my general Neurologist because of the speech issues and at this point my left hand had gotten worse. I could not button my shirt collar and found it difficult to button my jeans. I requested to be sent to WVU and that leads to where I am today.What I want to point out to you is that every person with ALS progresses at a different rate and with varying degrees of symptoms. Although there may be some people who wake up one day and cant move a certain limb, I believe this is the exception not the rule. With my case my weakness and atrophy took months to present. It was there from the beginning but slowly progressed. When the weakness is slight, it can be and is often overlooked or attributed to something else. ALS is a progressive disease but make no mistake IT DOES PROGRESS. For those of you who only have twitching as a symptom and you have had this for months with no signs of weakness; YOU DO NOT HAVE ALS!!!!! It will rear it's ugly head and even if the docs miss it at first, you will know. When I went to my appointment yesterday, although I continued to hope for a different diagnosis. I knew. I have read hundreds of posts from everyone on this board and I can tell you with 100% certainty that none of you are like me. You may have had some of the same symtoms at one time or another but you don't have the weakness that I developed.If any of you want to PM me to ask any specifics I would be happy to answer you. I want to continue to help people as long as I can. I may have ALS but ALS does not have me! Sincerely,Vince
 
Very sorry to hear that Vince.There is hope though. Nurown, Brainstorm, Genervon and more.Thinking of you are and your family.This isn't directed at anyone in particular but if you want to come into this thread and dissect Vince's post please consider what you are doing.
 
Vince, as I have been following you through your journey you know my thoughts and prayers have been with you and your family and we will continue to pray for a cure or reversal. Thank you for having the courage to explain your symtpoms and tell your story. With support and love,Greg
 
Vince,I send you and your family my thoughts and prayers. I also have to thank you for taking the time to come back to this site and explain your condition and how it progressed to an als dx. The fact that you cared enough about the members here to come back and explain the differences between your experience and the typical bfs one says a lot about the type of person you are. Thanks again and fight like hell....I love the fact that als doesn't have you! I'm a firm believer that adversity doesn't build character but rather it reveals character. You my friend are a man of high character, that is clear to me.Take care,Gary
 
Very sorry to hear the news, but you have the right attitude. A diagnosis is just a categorization of symptoms fitting a condition. Have you tried or considered going gluten free in your diet? Some people notice a profound difference. I just found a reference to an abstract published from the American Journal of Neuroradiology about a patient whose symptoms were mimicking ALS and they responded very well to a gluten-free diet. It may be worth a shot. Here is a link to the article if you are interested: Hang in there and never give up. You will be in our thoughts and prayers.
 
For those who may be panicking, according to the CDC, "ALS is age related; most people with ALS find out they have it when they are between 55 and 75 years of age."Source: According to Dana.org, for those younger than 40 years, "10 percent to 20 percent of people with ALS develop it before 40." Benign is likely.Source:
 
I am so, so sad and sorry. I hope you will not get attacked by idiots calling you fake as often happens because this - despite your initial clean EMG - does make sense and does sound like cases I know about.Stay strong, attitude is so important!Best wishes, Docen
 
Hello everyone,Please notice that April began his first twitch and within six months, in October, he had speech problems, aside from everything else. It's a quick disease most often. So try to not freak out as I am trying not to.Regards
 
Vince,I don't post very often on this site but i felt compelled to respond to you. My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family; I am so deeply sorry for this. Thank you for sharing this with us on the board. You truly have a lot of courage to explain your journey. ristinaL91
 
Again, thanks to everyone for their thoughts and prayers. And Juan, you are exactly right. For those who may be panicking, go back and read my post very carefully. My whole journey has been a couple weeks shy of 1 year. 1 year. In that time I went from twitching and cramping to barely being able to use my left hand and sounding like I am drunk 24/7. ALS progresses. Maybe a little slower for some (at least I hope) but make no mistake it progresses. No wax and wane symptoms that get better for 2 or 3 months then come back. I may have had a day here and there where my symptoms didn't SEEM as bad but they were always there and they got WORSE.Please understand that the purpose of my post is to inform you of what this disease looks like FOR ME so that you will know you are not like me. I'm sure that many of you can find symptoms that are similar to mine but you have to look at the entire picture; not just one symptom.My best to you all.Vince
 
Dear Vince, I dont think that we really ever wrote or spoke to each other directly here, but I did read many of your previous posts. Like everyone else on this forum, my heart goes out to you and your family and you will be in my prayers. I truely wish that there would be some sort of cure for this awful disease and I do believe that one day (soon) there will be hope as I still struggle with the fact that in 2015 there are some serious diseases as this one thats are not completly understood by specialists.You are right that many of us will say things like ''I have these symptoms as well'' but as you stated everyone is different and we need to push through ... I have been going through a rough patch of late (as seen in my last post) and I am still struggling and have many of the symptoms that you mentionned (excessive phlegm, constant focal twitching in the fore arm, cramps and others) but that doesnt mean that we are all the same and we all need to remember that ... mysellf included. I thank Gary, and everyone else for trying to help me (us) here when we need it most. Thanks for sharing your story Vince and I really hope that you stay strong and keep well. Will
 
Dear Vince,I am so sorry to hear the bad news, I read your post in tears... You are such a brave and open-minded person; a true inspiration to us all.I wish all best to you and your family and I hope you will have a very slow progression.Regards,Cro
 
Dear Vince, Please accept my deepest condolences. I did not see this coming, as I have had the same symptoms above as you and Will. Thanks for coming back and clarifying the timeline, in one old post it says you started twitching in April of 2013, not 2014. Do you still get those cramps? I had them just like that but they have pretty much gone away for a few months now after getting worse for a few months but always there from the beginning. I was 46 when this started and 48 now. BFS surely can be a mimic and I'm still hoping they take it back.I wish you all the best in this journey, you will be in my prayers for sure. Peace.
 
Thank you and yes I still have the cramping but it has gotten much worse. Each month that passed it became more widespread and frequent. I am starting Riluzole today and my hope is that it may delay progression. If I posted April of 2013 that was a typo. Everything started in April of 2014. I also wanted to mention that the abnormalities found on my second EMG from Cleveland Clinic that were attributed to possible cervical problems did not meet the El Escorial Criteria for MND and I believe that's why Cleveland Clinic indicated that there was "insufficient" evidence for a diagnosis of widespread damage as found in MND. If they had offered me a follow-up appointment to look for progression they would have found it by January, I'm sure. That would have been 9 months from beginning symptoms. But keep in mind that I had that EMG in September of 2014 and they found abnormalities so that was only 5 months after first symptoms.Vince
 
You have all helped me so much over the last year. The first 3 or 4 months were the absolute worse for me and I was quickly sliding into a dark place. You all pulled me out of that and gave me encouragement and strength as well as invaluable information. I really do feel blessed to have had the time to research and prepare myself for this and I have met some amazing people. As I said, when things kept progressing I knew in my heart that it was unlikely I would escape this but then I began thinking about others that were so much less fortunate than I. I imagined the countless number of children fighting for their lives with terminal cancer; those who lost their loved one suddenly from a heart attach or stroke or accident. None of us know the number of our days and I am being 100% honest with you when I tell you I am at peace with this and consider myself blessed to know that my time is limited so that I can love my family and friends with all that is within me for as long as I can. You truly gain a different perspective on life. I was not shaken, nervous or emotional when the doc gave me the news, however my heart broke into when I looked over at my beautiful wife and saw the tears streaming down her face. I have 2 brothers and 5 sisters and I am the baby. They have absolutely flooded me with overwhelming support and love and I can't help but feel how lucky I am. You are all strangers yet you take the time to send me positive well wishes and prayers. How wonderful is that? As humans we have amazing spirits and energy that we share with one another through contact, whether physical or simply by thought process. I don't think there is anything more powerful than that. I feel a little guilty sometimes with all this support but know that I'm sending it right back out to you all.
 
Vince,You strike me as not only brave, but also so empathetic and kindhearted, because even though the vast majority of us are dealing with a benign condition: you are taking the time to reassure the BFSers that they are going to be okay. All while getting a very dire diagnosis. That amazes me. I just hope that you don't lose hope, because from what I understand, many progressions are being made right now in the fight of this awful disease. I just signed a petition to fast track the trials and release of a drug (forgetting it's name) that is supposed to be remarkable in slowing and or stopping progression. I also emailed a number of people involved in this to get more movement on it. I hope you can push your doctors to try anything that is innovative at this point.Anyway, I also wanted to let you know how sorry I am that you are dealing with the horrible disease, and I will pray for you, that things move quickly in the treatment of it.
 
Of course! I am surprised this hasn't been posted before. I'm not on here frequently anymore, so I just figured someone must have shared it at some point.Here it is:Genervon's GM6 is the medication.
 

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