Living with Twitching: Experiences

[coolwiz4110]

Hello all,

First off let me say what a great site this is for those of us with this twitching. I have been twitching for almost 4 years now with periods of almost no twitches mixed with flare-ups like right now.

You know how they say ignorance is bliss? Well in my case it was. When I started twitching after a very nasty viral infection 4 years ago, I quickly turned to the fountain of knowledge the internet for a handy diagnosis. And thank God this one of the first sites I found. I read the symptoms of BFS and decided that yes that was what I most likely had, and left it at that and got on with my life.

After a while my twitches slowly subsided and sort of became a background soundtrack for my life, always there but not in the forefront.
But recently after going through some serious stressors, i.e. transfering to a new location, selling a house, buying a house, and a new baby on the way the twiches came back with a vengance. I mean it was like they were out to make up for lost time. I couldn't sleep, constant twitches 24/7, jolting myself awake so hard I thought I was going to snap my neck a time or two. To me it felt like my whole nervous system was charged with a high voltage, and I could almost feel every nerve in my body getting ready to fire. It seemed like the twitches in my calves which are always present started to migrate to new locations like the soles of my feet, and I started getting twitches in my hands (my new personal favorite).

So I thought that I would finally go in and see my GP, and see what he had to say. After doing a basic neuro exam, not suprisingly he said that I shouldn't worry, if it's been 4 years then it most likely isn't something serious. But he referred me to a neuro for a consult "just to give me some reassurance". I go in 2 weeks time.

So recently I casually returned to the internet to re-visit the issue to kill some time one day, and of course like most of you I found the infamous *** sites. Even after going through this for 4 years these sites gave me some serious food for thought. I know what you are all thinking... gee I wish it was 4 years for me, I would be laughing right now. Well I guess that is the point I am trying to make in this long winded post. If I had found those sites first instead of this one I don't know how these last 4 years would have turned out. I can only imagine the grief and misery I would have inflicted upon myself worrying about ***.

So my moral if there is one, is that despite it being in our nature to wonder what is on that next webpage about twitching do yourselves a big favor, skip the internet research and go to the park with your kids. Ignorance is truly bliss in this case!

p.s. I love how the twitching trys to keep itself interesting. Just when I am getting bored of one symptom, the program directors in my body decide to come out with something fresh and new for the upcoming season.

Thanks again for this site, and all you guys and girls rock!!!

 

[TrisTrip]

I’m going to die.

I've been twitching for 17 of my 32 years but its all been in my calfs – it’s never bothered me until one faithful day when it was joined by lightheadedness and upper body twitches.

At that time I flashed onto the internet and read all about ALS & MS. As I lost 10 lbs. practically overnight (bulpilar onset anyone) – “O MY GOD I'M GOING TO DIE!”.

Well what do you know, because I was sure I had ALS (or MS, or FILL IN THE DEADLY DISEASE HERE), my twitching shot through the roof. I started to get depressed (severely) and anxious (severely).

I racked my body with the effects that this induces, changing the chemicals in my brain (through depression) to the point of mimicking symptoms of ALS and MS. I was bed ridden and I was a goner – the worst part is that it would be a slow, painful, twitching death racked with panic and lack of sleep. Or, I thought; I could rap my lips around my .45 and make it quick - I was in a seriously bad place.

As it turns out my death was going to be slow indeed.

I have confirmed that I’m going to die, slowly, and twitching over the next 60-70 years – provided I don’t get hit by a bus or something equally unforeseen.

I’ve decided to use logic and science to convince myself, with my doctors help, that I don’t have anything seriously wrong with me (physically) except that I twitch and sometimes I’m lightheaded.

Amongst a myriad of testing, I’ve had an MRI and a CT that show severe sinusitis and that my Eustachian tubes are full of fluid. – In short: my ears crackle and pop like Rice Krispies (read: DIZZZZZZY).

The thing of it is; I knew all about my ear problems when my ALS /MS scare started. I was told by doctors, following a CT scan after a head injury years ago (causing me to lose all my CSF fluid through a nostril), that I had bad sinusitis. But instead of attributing my lightheadedness to sinusitis, I chose the imaginary DEADLY DISEASE.

I’ve always considered myself a man among men; I’ve been a soldier, an accomplished firearms instructor, a triathlete, and an internationally competitive cyclist.

As it turned out, only one man was strong enough to take me down - MYSELF!

I’m done kicking my as*. - For now anyways, but it’s a constant struggle.

I still freak out sometimes and may start the self-butt-kicking all over again but I’m learning to mount a splendid self-counter offensive.

Maybe I will get hit by a bus, but I can see from my office window that it’s a beautiful day and I know the lilac will smell wonderful so I'll take my chances and rollerblade home.

 

[CristenLaney]

Just wanted to say that your posts make me feel SOOO much better...have just started having a twitch that is coming and going and like you said researched the internet to find myself thinking I'm definitely heading towards the MS or ALS direction. I am now working on destressing and working through my anxieties and focusing more on my family, exercise and diet...thank you thank you thank you for your reassuring post that I'm not dying of any of those diseases!!! )

 

[OPHIAzkatieSOPH]

When I read Trijeffs post- I see myself--- the way I was. I was beridden- in my mind seeing my own death- a horrible death- it was awful- and I put my immediate family thru hell. I have read these posts that sound just like me--you all sound so much like me- one begins to wonder why there is this constantancy with symptoms-physically and emotionally. Perhaps- for some odd reason we have all gone thru nearly the same things- felt exactly the same, and were drawn to the same conclusion. I want to reassure any newcomers that if you experience what most people on this site say they experience- the chances are you have this thing called bfs that manifests itself in people who have a hyper-awareness about their bodies and are constant thinkers- have you noticed how thoughtful and smart most people are in their posts? Perhaps our minds never rest- I have said before- my husband twitches here and there and he would never think to get on the net and research it. It is definitly a mind-body connection.