My life was a pressure cooker.
I was struggling to impress people in a job I really didn't love. My wife had one miscarriage, and we were raising our first child, something I wasn't very comfortable I could do well. I felt like everything was on me - earning a living, performing as a dad, watching my parents separate, watching friends one by one either move away or get too busy in their own worlds. Life was becoming hard, lonely and stressful.
My twitching also started fairly innocuously, I remember about two weeks the month prior where my right eyelid would not quit. Then it went away. Then about two days of my right thigh, just above my knee, and I wondered if I should see a doctor - maybe there's a treatment or a pill that quiets things down. Instead, the next day, at work, I googled twitching, and the rest is history. I wonder to this day if I had just gone to the doctor instead, and had him/her tell me eyelid/leg twitching is normal - just ride it out - where I'd be today. Maybe I'd know the association between that symptom and **S. And maybe not. Well, no use crying over spilt milk.
Suffice to say, there was stress, pressure, and I believe either self-loathing, or at least a ton of self-doubt setting in. Whether these are the magic ingredients that bring us here or not, it seems a lot of us fit in that camp.
JG