Dealing with Anxiety at 18

[KookyKrissy]

This has been going on for about 3 and a half months now. Right after a viral infection and complete day of crying and fearing death. The body twitches don't disturb me as much as the facial twitches do. I am only 18 and living with severe anxiety. Nobody really knows it because I do a good job of hiding my emotions from others. I have thought about suicide but can not because it is against my religion. So then I thought about joining the armed forces and putting my self in a predicament, that there is no chance of me getting out alive. Every day i live with the fear of dying (yes, I know it is self contradicting). I have a phobia of sleeping because I have a fear of never waking up, so it has been hard for me to go to sleep lately. I have strong and sometimes visible palpatiations throughout my body. A close friend of the family just died and that just made me realize even more how precious and short life really is. The twitch that worries me the most is around the mouth area and by the chin. I talk to people at the gym and mostly all twitch after a workout on there body. I fear that I slur my words, even though i'm not, so sometimes i will talk to myself and repeat things. I am just a nervous wreck. I was taking un-perscribed alprozalam for a while but stopped. I work out frequently and have not noticed any weakness/atrophy. If anything I am gaining muscle. Right not I have this eye quiver thing going on, twitches by the calves and twitches above the lip and sometimes under the lip. The twitches are not chronic, they come and go throughout the day. i may have 7 or sometimes 1 twitch around the mouth area, it fluctuates daily. I believe that I went one day without a twitch there.I have thought of getting an emg but fear the result. I figured that if i have this disease what is the point of getting tested, I will die anyways.Throughout this entire experience I have really started questioning my religion and the afterlife and God. I have to get in touch with myself once again spiritually. This has been all part of my depression/anxiety.

 

[MarioMasher]

Go see a doctor. He'll tell you the exact same thing anyone else on this board will tell you. That's not even close to ALS. The fact that the twitches are moving around pretty proves that. My second comment might sound harsh, but it's meant to sort of make you think about the way you are approaching this. If you are truly developing a sense of how precious life is, and how much life means to a person, don't you think it's sort of counter-intuitive to be thinking about death all the time? If you really do appreciate how special the gift of life is, shouldn't you be enjoying yours? It sounds like you are just trying to think of ways to make yourself miserable. And that's not celebrating life, that's just creating personal obstacles for yourself.My advice to you is to go to A) a doctor, or B) a neurologist, or C) a psychiatrist, and figure out why you are so unhappy with yourself. You know they are going to tell you that nothing is wrong with you. Why are you so frightened about hearing that? Do you just for some reason need to think of yourself as "a sick person"?Here's something you might want to keep in mind. Facial twitches are generally the least serious twitches a person can have. We all get them! I've had eyelid twitching since I was 12.Go see a doctor. Listen to him tell you the exact same thing I am telling you. Then enjoy life. Like you said, it is a precious gift. You need to find some psychological way to relate to that.