Breaking the Cycle of Fear and Anxiety

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J

JCVanilla4125

Well-known member
Well said dwl.
The anecdotal horror stories serve no purpose other than to generate fear!
Kerri, you really need help. You keep searching for that magic test that is going to relieve you of all your fears and that test doesn't exist. The problem is not whether you have ALS or not (which you don't), the problem is your anxiety disorder. You only serve to feed your fear by searching the internet to find the exceptions to the rule which only hurts you. Bringing it back to this board though hurts alot of other people who are also scared and anxious. They come here for comfort and education not fear and speculation! You really have to get a grip on yourself! I'm not trying to put you down, I'm just saying what alot of other people have already told you... you need help.
 
Kerri --

Hang in there -- you will make it through. Kerri - I have a hunch that if you do not stay away from these sites you will lose more than the dream job you have already lost. See how you feel after 1 month away from these sites. I got very busy and did not come to the site for a couple months and I felt better than ever. Do not risking losing the things you love most about life for your obsessions on these websites.

I know it is hard, but you should call you ISP and disconnect. Just pick up the phone and walk away from the internet for a while.

RareAir
 
Kerri,

I agree with the others. Get help!!! No one wants to see you doing this to yourself. Disconnect from the internet and believe what your doctors have told you.
GOod Luck,
Jen
 
Kerri-

Life really is a mystery...some days are good, some days are not so good, and some days are just sort of neutral. One thing that is really important to do is to try to relax during those tense moments. As you know from the many posts here and on other sites, twitching is not a precursor for ALS. Is it true that people who twitch could develop ALS? Of course. Is it true that people who don't twitch could develop ALS? Of course. Are you more likely to develop ALS because you are twitching? Not as far as I have ever heard or read.

I do understand how you feel...the twitches really can play mind games with you and everyone else. The trick is to out-smart them and tell yourself that you are ok...that it is not the end and that good days lie ahead. Time is generally a healer and the further out you go in time the better you will generally feel. Sometimes a little help is necessary and that is fine..in fact, having someone work you through your feelings is a great idea. I did it, as did others hear.

One other thing...You know Christopher Reeve? Former Superman who had that terrible horse-back riding accident? I think you are aware of his current condition. Think about your situation like this. Think about the worst day that you have had with your symptoms...the worst day....maybe today, maybe yesterday or maybe a month ago. Now imagine asking ftheatrepher reeve if he would trade any day of his current life for your worst day...what do you think he would say? My point is that for the rest of his life, his best day will never even come close to your worst day. Each of our live's is really a blessing.

--David
 
These were his first symptoms. Nowhere did I read that he complained of BFS symptoms.

Later the article states that a doctor noticed atrophy in his hands, and only after some time was twitching noticed by his doctors.

Nowhere does it say that Jarrod himself complained of twitching.

Please, please, be sure of your facts before posting scary stuff like this on the forum.

Twyla
 
I read an article in the UK Daily Express about 2.5 years ago. The article was by the player himself, and it is probably the same person that you are referring to.

Twitching factored a lot in the article, and this was occuring before he was diagnosed with ALS, and before he noticed serious weakness problems.

I realise that I am going by memory, but the article scared me so much it is virtually burned into my brain. I sat there reading it over and over again.

He mentioned lying in bed unable to sleep for his twitching body. At one point he mentioned his arms shaking a lot (and this was is the relativrly early stages). He also mentioned that the only thing that seemed to stop the twitching was getting drunk.

I'm NOT making this up to scare people. Hey it scared me terribly because I'd not long started twitching when I read that article.

However the article did mention a lot of other aspects in addition to twitching. It was an entire tabloid sized page with one photo of his face in the centre.

So I stand by what I've semi-quoted. Sorry if it's scared anyone.


Flash
 
Flash19 wrote:

I'm NOT making this up to scare people. Hey it scared me terribly because I'd not long started twitching when I read that article.

Flash, I didn't mean to suggest that you were "making it up to scare people"....just that you didn't have all the facts.

However the article did mention a lot of other aspects in addition to twitching.

Exactly, and those would make all the difference to people here who are suffering from mostly twitching and don't have the other symptoms he reported early on.....balance and co-ordination problems, and atrophy.

Again, I think it would be wise if all of us refrained from posting stories of "bfs turning into ALS" without having the whole, factual story. Actually it might be a good idea not to post even with all the facts. What's the use when it just scares everyone and it's gotta be very, very, very rare anyway.

Twyla
ps. Flash, I enjoyed your "dying sway" story....LOL...you are a talented writer!
 
Kerri wrote:

P.S. when did this guy see a doctor anyway


Well, here is the first mention of seeing a doctor in Jarrod Cunningham's story. This was after he quit the rugby team because he knew his performance wasn't up to par, but he had no idea of what was wrong with him. There's no mention of any other symptoms at this point.

"The main thing I had found trouble with when training was that when I opened my hands to catch the ball my thumb on my right hand was not extending fully and this was why I was dropping the ball. "I talked to a couple of Physiotherapists about this and was told it could be a trapped nerve somewhere so I was referred to an Orthopaedic surgeon." This would be a decision that would change the lives of Jarrod & Carrie and their families forever. "Carrie and I went along with still no idea what the root of the problem was and we both hoped to be given a simple solution by the specialist."
The doctor performed a physical examination and asked if Jarrod had noticed the muscle wastage in his right thumb and along the outside edge of the palm. The doctor pointed to it and it was then that Jarrod realised that things may be worse than they seemed.
"When I looked closely I could hardly believe the difference I could see between my two hands. The doctor also noticed muscle fasciculation's in my deltoid muscles."

This story was written by Damon Harvey, a close friend of Jarrod and Carrie's. Damon has known JC for over ten years, firstly as a friend, then as commentator of his rugby career and now as a "positive" supporter of Jarrod and other PALS.

Twyla
 
Gee thanks Twyla,

Guess what I just spend the last hour doing? That's right checking out my hands, thumbs and palms in particular. Of course I'm convinced that the right one is smaller than the left, although it depends what angle I view them from. Also since I'm mostly right handed that doesn't make sense as it should be bigger. Also this is the hand that faltrered with the screwdriver on Saturday.

Although my sensible head tells me that my body is not and never will be symmetrical, the part of my brain that controls my bowels thinks differently.

I'm now unfairly holding you responsible for me checking my freakin hands several times a day for at least the next 6 months, and probably longer.

Just as I was feeling bettter:(

I knew I shouldn't have gotten sucked into reading that.

Now where did I put those grip strengthener thingies?


Flash
 
I watch my palms very carefully too :eek:
For at least 2 months I think. For now they seem to the same (thanks God) but sometimes I'm not sure. I learned that all depends from the light (from which side the light is).

regards
M.
 
Flash & Pole,

You two missed the point that atrophy in ALS is very obvious, as Jarrod said.....he was amazed at the difference between his two hands. You guys are looking for subtle differences.....examining your hands in different lights, etc....it sounds like a bad case of anxiety to me.

Relax.....and take heart....one of these days you'll put your ALS fears behind you, as I have, and get on with your life.

Twyla
 
Is it my imagination or does Kerri not check back after posting? Sometimes I don't even think she reads the answers for whatever reassurance she might receive.
 
I read all of the postings Gabelle, but then we get posters on here who scare me, and then I question who is right and who is wrong. I know I should try and listen to my docs and I do listen but my body does not feel right but I suppose if I stopped worrying my body will feel better.

I am not a bad person just a very scared one. I have met people on this forum that do help me and when they are hear I usually get better.
I need to stay better that is the hard thing. I was told over in Braintalk maybe it was by you, people normal people that is twitch 12-24 times a day this may be true, but I guess the twitching is not really my problem, my true problem is that I even twitch, if I twitch once a day everyday and stopped twitching for a year I would still remember that I had one symptom of a very horrible disease, and that right there is what keeps me anxious, twitching can mean bad things, it could also mean nothing but the fact that it could mean something is a hypo's nightmare.
The fact that they can never 100 percent rule it out also helps to fuel my anxiety.

Kerri
 

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