massagefanrx
Well-known member
Hi everyone,
Wanted to thank you all for creating such a great forum. It has definitely helped lower my anxiety. Here's my story...
First of all, I'm a 33 year old yoga & pilates instructor and a massage therapist. And, I'll get it out right away that I'm a self professed hypochondriac (strange considering the fields I'm in, huh?)! Whenever I get anything, I always assume the worst. Anyway, about 1 year ago I decided to deal with a strange symptom I've had all my life. it is what I call the "wake up right after falling asleep with my whole body vibrating and my heart racing" Yes, vibrating (mostly upper body). Doctors looked at me like I was wacky. They tested me for seizures...So after being wrapped in this turban like thing with electrodes on my head, I had some quirky brain function but nothing indicating true seizures. 5 days of itchy head and total stress. MRI showed a small lesion but when compared to an MRI five years ago, no change. Determination- benign. Vibrating, heart racing thing- stress. SO, neurologist says to see a neurologist/psychologist who specialzes in this kind of thing. I say ok (with good intentions)...as a mother of two, it never happened. And, to really top it off, it totally goes away the day after the test results. Your mind is an amazing thing, needless to say! I still get it on and off but the fact that I don't worry about it helps. I know this seems off topic but I'm starting to believe it may have been the start of BFS.
Then, back in May 2006 I get this eye twich that lasts at least two weeks. OF COURSE, I look it up online but came across nothing foreboding. It went away...THEN, back in early July 2006, after a particularly stressful week (and day in particular)...a gym I had taught at for 10 years closed it's doors with no warning and I was out of work and my other massage job was having issue with me owning my own massage company and it looked like I'd be out of work there too- not good! I had a couple of days of aching in my legs which I thought may have been related to varicose veins- burning, stuff like that. Then, lo and behold, I go to bed (very stressed out) and both of my calves are twitching like crazy. It was 5:30 am before I fell asleep. Then, I googled. Oh my- BIG mistake. Convinced bad,bad things were happening. Then, I swear I woke up with my tongue twitching one night and totally freaked out, thinking this is it! Then, I proceeded through the MS & ALS sites and managed to get nearly every symptom on them. My mind tells me that I'm being unreasonable but I just can't shake it! So, I decided to go back on Klonopin which I took years ago for panic attacks in my 20's. Though the twitching didn't disappear, it did seem to make my mind a little clearer that "no weakness, no problem" My problem with all this is that after teaching aerobics for 10 years and then stopping cold turkey for a month or so (I was still walking 4 miles or so but no lifting or pilates), is that I actually was getting weaker because I wasn't working out. Couldn't have happened at a worse time. Anyway, I had an app't with a neuro (same one as last year) but they had to cancel last minute. Then I had a 4 day period of time when I didn't notice hardly any twitches. Then, I was talking to my mom on the phone yesterday and I said "I think I've been 4 days without many twitches so maybe I won't bother with the appointment- I'll just see how things go" THEN, I had my calf rested on my leg and noticed that it was still twitching but I just didn't feel it. So, guess what, total twitch all the time since then. I feel like I've spent so much wasted time rushing to doctors that I was hoping this time I could avoid it. I know I should probably be tested for Lyme as I do spend time on an island where it's prevalent. And I have lost a few pounds so I suppose I should have my Thyroid tested (though I had it done last year)- I believe it's due to stress and lost of muscle from not working out. But I just know how freaked out I'm going to be if they suggest any of those muscle tests. So, with September almost here, I'm starting 2 new fitness positions..one of which I did a demo class today. My muscles seemed shaky but given it's been a couple months I shouldn't be surprised. I was still able to teach a normal class. I'm just sick of all the silly strength testing I've been doing (a couple push ups on my fingertips, squeezing things as tight as I can). I know I'm inflamming my muscles by doing this but I get nuts about it. The Klonopin does help put things into perspective but I don't want to be on it forever. Then, my husband suggests we watch one of his favorite movies last night- the Lou Gehrig Story. A great movie but definitely not the best choice for me clearly. After, my finger hurt, seemed weak. I decided it was probably going to get worse if I kept trying to pick up heavy bags with it to test it's strength. (duh- I know!)
Anyway,...a couple questions for anyone still reading this terribly long winded post..
1) Prior to when the twitching started 2 months ago, I never had problems after exercise. Now, the twitching is SO intense after exercise and as an instructor, I can't avoid it. Does anyone else have experience with excess twitching after having kicked down an exercise program considerably and then stepping it up again? Will it always be intense after or will the muscles get used to it?
2) The twitching is constant in my calves but intermittent in other areas. I can see it and feel it for the past 2 months. But, as far as clinical weakness, if I really think about it I know I wouldn't be able to lead my normal life- using my hands all the time for massage, walking good distances, etc..but I still can't shake the feeling of wondering if I'm missing the start of the weakness (as a subtle thing that would take more than two months to develop)
3) What is it about Klonopin that helps lessen the twitching? Would Klonopin have the same effect if it were a muscle disease?
4) Did I make a mistake with this- when the twitching had stopped for 1 day, I stopped taking the Klonopin...I went another 3 days without any Klonopin and with much lessened twitching. Then, back to the starting block with the twitching. Should I have just kept taking it? FYI- I take 0.5 mg a day when taking it.
5) Am I making a mistake by not rescheduling the neurologist app't? I'm trying to figure out how long I'm going to be back and forth between knowing everything is fine and being CONVINCED that it's not..it's so draining!
Thanks for any advice and sorry for the lengthy post. I'll keep it brief next time!
Shelley
Wanted to thank you all for creating such a great forum. It has definitely helped lower my anxiety. Here's my story...
First of all, I'm a 33 year old yoga & pilates instructor and a massage therapist. And, I'll get it out right away that I'm a self professed hypochondriac (strange considering the fields I'm in, huh?)! Whenever I get anything, I always assume the worst. Anyway, about 1 year ago I decided to deal with a strange symptom I've had all my life. it is what I call the "wake up right after falling asleep with my whole body vibrating and my heart racing" Yes, vibrating (mostly upper body). Doctors looked at me like I was wacky. They tested me for seizures...So after being wrapped in this turban like thing with electrodes on my head, I had some quirky brain function but nothing indicating true seizures. 5 days of itchy head and total stress. MRI showed a small lesion but when compared to an MRI five years ago, no change. Determination- benign. Vibrating, heart racing thing- stress. SO, neurologist says to see a neurologist/psychologist who specialzes in this kind of thing. I say ok (with good intentions)...as a mother of two, it never happened. And, to really top it off, it totally goes away the day after the test results. Your mind is an amazing thing, needless to say! I still get it on and off but the fact that I don't worry about it helps. I know this seems off topic but I'm starting to believe it may have been the start of BFS.
Then, back in May 2006 I get this eye twich that lasts at least two weeks. OF COURSE, I look it up online but came across nothing foreboding. It went away...THEN, back in early July 2006, after a particularly stressful week (and day in particular)...a gym I had taught at for 10 years closed it's doors with no warning and I was out of work and my other massage job was having issue with me owning my own massage company and it looked like I'd be out of work there too- not good! I had a couple of days of aching in my legs which I thought may have been related to varicose veins- burning, stuff like that. Then, lo and behold, I go to bed (very stressed out) and both of my calves are twitching like crazy. It was 5:30 am before I fell asleep. Then, I googled. Oh my- BIG mistake. Convinced bad,bad things were happening. Then, I swear I woke up with my tongue twitching one night and totally freaked out, thinking this is it! Then, I proceeded through the MS & ALS sites and managed to get nearly every symptom on them. My mind tells me that I'm being unreasonable but I just can't shake it! So, I decided to go back on Klonopin which I took years ago for panic attacks in my 20's. Though the twitching didn't disappear, it did seem to make my mind a little clearer that "no weakness, no problem" My problem with all this is that after teaching aerobics for 10 years and then stopping cold turkey for a month or so (I was still walking 4 miles or so but no lifting or pilates), is that I actually was getting weaker because I wasn't working out. Couldn't have happened at a worse time. Anyway, I had an app't with a neuro (same one as last year) but they had to cancel last minute. Then I had a 4 day period of time when I didn't notice hardly any twitches. Then, I was talking to my mom on the phone yesterday and I said "I think I've been 4 days without many twitches so maybe I won't bother with the appointment- I'll just see how things go" THEN, I had my calf rested on my leg and noticed that it was still twitching but I just didn't feel it. So, guess what, total twitch all the time since then. I feel like I've spent so much wasted time rushing to doctors that I was hoping this time I could avoid it. I know I should probably be tested for Lyme as I do spend time on an island where it's prevalent. And I have lost a few pounds so I suppose I should have my Thyroid tested (though I had it done last year)- I believe it's due to stress and lost of muscle from not working out. But I just know how freaked out I'm going to be if they suggest any of those muscle tests. So, with September almost here, I'm starting 2 new fitness positions..one of which I did a demo class today. My muscles seemed shaky but given it's been a couple months I shouldn't be surprised. I was still able to teach a normal class. I'm just sick of all the silly strength testing I've been doing (a couple push ups on my fingertips, squeezing things as tight as I can). I know I'm inflamming my muscles by doing this but I get nuts about it. The Klonopin does help put things into perspective but I don't want to be on it forever. Then, my husband suggests we watch one of his favorite movies last night- the Lou Gehrig Story. A great movie but definitely not the best choice for me clearly. After, my finger hurt, seemed weak. I decided it was probably going to get worse if I kept trying to pick up heavy bags with it to test it's strength. (duh- I know!)
Anyway,...a couple questions for anyone still reading this terribly long winded post..
1) Prior to when the twitching started 2 months ago, I never had problems after exercise. Now, the twitching is SO intense after exercise and as an instructor, I can't avoid it. Does anyone else have experience with excess twitching after having kicked down an exercise program considerably and then stepping it up again? Will it always be intense after or will the muscles get used to it?
2) The twitching is constant in my calves but intermittent in other areas. I can see it and feel it for the past 2 months. But, as far as clinical weakness, if I really think about it I know I wouldn't be able to lead my normal life- using my hands all the time for massage, walking good distances, etc..but I still can't shake the feeling of wondering if I'm missing the start of the weakness (as a subtle thing that would take more than two months to develop)
3) What is it about Klonopin that helps lessen the twitching? Would Klonopin have the same effect if it were a muscle disease?
4) Did I make a mistake with this- when the twitching had stopped for 1 day, I stopped taking the Klonopin...I went another 3 days without any Klonopin and with much lessened twitching. Then, back to the starting block with the twitching. Should I have just kept taking it? FYI- I take 0.5 mg a day when taking it.
5) Am I making a mistake by not rescheduling the neurologist app't? I'm trying to figure out how long I'm going to be back and forth between knowing everything is fine and being CONVINCED that it's not..it's so draining!
Thanks for any advice and sorry for the lengthy post. I'll keep it brief next time!
Shelley