harvest-
Are these the spinal mri's that you just had that are negative? If so, this is awesome news.
How can I answer your question re: anxiety? Hmmmm....well, for me it is just a symptom (or is it the root cause?) of this whole mess.
I believe we who have health anxiety must come to a point where we are just sick and tired of being sick and tired, (and scared.)
For me, I had to go through several rounds of tests, mri's, lumbar puncture, evoked potentials, emg, 4 different neuros (2 of whom were MS specialists) multiple other specialists-rheumie, neurosurgeon, cardiologist, reproductive endocrinologist, and probably countless others that I am forgetting. All of them said there was nothing terribly wrong, but didn't know what WAS causing my symptoms. The best I got was a fibromyalgia dx-which I never bought.
Even after that I STILL didn't believe that I was okay. But then I found this board and read "bfs in a nutshell" and my life was forever changed. After that, I deeply regretted all of the days and nights I wasted, fretting about the incurable disease I never had.
This was the journey I took toward sanity. Had I known all the symptoms bfs could cause (outside of twitching,) I might have spared myself untold amount of angst, or would I? Here, you've had negative tests and the benefit of knowing your diagnosis yet you are still afraid. We all have to do it our own way, I suppose.
I wish I could throw a switch in your spirit to get your "peace" receptors into high gear. I can't. All I can do is share my experience and the hope that I have from knowing that I may have symptoms that mimic other, terrible disease, but I do not HAVE those diseases. I just have bfs. Yes, new symptoms will crop up fairly regularly. Time has proven this. But with time also comes acceptance, growth, maturity, and strength. Perhaps this is what you are needing most of all. Just plain old time to adapt and integrate these crazy symptoms into your life. And hopefully sooner than later, you will be laughing, living, and loving and not giving bfs the time of day.
Please do not be discouraged. There is so much hope here. Read the stories and see that it's true. Make up your mind to stop doing internet research ( I can't help but suspect you are going on-line often and looking up bad stuff--we've all been there...) Peace can't co-exist with fear. Don't let fear into your thoughts, and peace will prevail.
