I think what EyeoftheWild is hinting at would be my advice, too.
It seems many of us with bfs tend to be intense, passionate people.
Both of these are great qualities, however, I think they can also be our downfall.
So, in addition to what has already been so brilliantly recommended about staying off the internet and believing our doctors, I would say that some of us need to lighten up. Live. Love. LAUGH.
We can't solve all of the world's problems, and our desire to do so ( in my humble opinion,) is what got us into this mess in the first place. There is a great deception that tells us if we can save the world, we can save ourselves, or if we keep doing, doing, DOING, we can establish order. It's a lie.
As a child, I grew up in a terribly unpredictable and dysfunctional household. It caused me to quickly learn that I needed to have control of my life, and hold on to it as if my life depended upon it.
BFS taught me that I can't control everything. I can manage my unhealthy thoughts, change my diet, exercise, etc, but ultimately I have no control over my body or my symptoms, and that's what we all need to "get" into our thick heads. It's the serenity prayer all over again, every day...Grant me the serenity to accept the things I can NOT change, the courage to change the things I CAN and the WISDOM to know the difference.
Worrying doesn't change a thing. It doesn't matter how many doctors we go to, how many hours we spend googling. It won't impact the bottom line, won't control this condition, and won't do us any good.
But actively NOT worrying, seeking ONLY that which will fill our minds with peace and calm...this is what we must do if we are to recover from this malady. It requires discipline and discernment, but it can be done.
The other night I was fretting, because I had to get up in front of a group of people. It should have been a much larger group, but because it was a week night, there were less people than we'd anticipated. I started to beat myself up over it, AND get anxious about what the audience would think of me, blah, blah, blah.
I just told myself to cut it out, and forced myself to stop thinking about it. Each time the thoughts crept back in, I told myself that this was no longer open for internal discussion.
)
Sorry for this long post, but if we could all just take the same energy required to worry and ruminate over what is wrong with us, and apply it to doing the exact opposite, we would feel so much better, physically and emotionally.
So, that's my advice. Stop being so intense, and stop allowing bfs to be so all encompassing. Achieve this by challenging your internal dialogue. And for heaven's sake, figure out how to laugh again.
Blessings,
Sue
